I started my career in Social Work when I was 24, having worked as a home carer whilst studying for my Social Work qualification. Although most Social Workers these days qualify as younger postgraduates than when I qualified, I was the youngest on my course and easily the youngest in my team when I gained my first position. Looking back, being a young female thrust into a busy child protection environment, I felt unprepared. Many of the parents I was working with were suspicious of me because of my age, and lack of direct parenting experience. Many of the male service users I worked with were intimidating and abusive and I often had to take one of my older male colleagues on visits with me. Service Users I could cope with, but I also had to deal with colleagues and other professionals undermining my professionalism and confidence. I would be chairing meetings full of professionals from health, legal, education, all of whom would be on much higher wages than me, and I was the one to ensure that they fulfilled their action points. I was frequently spoken down to, patronised, and I was even told in one professionals meeting that I ‘looked about 12’, which obviously made me feel very insecure in those environments.
Looking back, that difficult start certainly gave my backbone for Social Work, and I toughened up and let my practice do the talking. Once I had found my feet, I also found some positive mentors in the managers I had (all female, all juggling home life, and achieving in the work place). These women gave me the confidence to believe in myself, and I learned much from them about holding your own, professional challenges and having clear work/home boundaries.
After I got married and had children I really understood the pressure of wearing all the hats that 21stCentury women are required to wear. Typical households now require two wages and therefore once I had children, staying at home was not an option, I needed to be working. Luckily for me I had family support in my parents who were on hand to help with the childcare (my mum has rescued me more times than I can count, another strong role model). My children do have two parents, but I am sure I am not alone in it being the mum who picks up the lion’s share of the mental load that comes with child rearing – World Book Day being a particular bane of my life!! Just last week I finished work 45 minutes early to get to parents evening for 4.30 – 6pm appointments with my youngest child, to then take her to her pantomime performance, where I had in my wisdom volunteered as a backstage chaperone, all whilst trying to ensure everybody including the dog had something that vaguely resembled tea!
Back to my career path, I was encouraged by one female manager who had always championed me to apply for my first managerial post. My friend/colleague and I decided after much deliberation that we would present ourselves as a joint package and try and persuade the employer to take us on as a job share – we were successful, and my first managerial post was spent with the support of my fellow new manager. We were women of the same age, with children of exactly the same age, so it was an ideal opportunity to dip our toes into the world of management whilst ensuring that we had the mutual support from each other. From that time, I went from strength to strength, holding numerous management positions, always having one eye on flexibility to enable me to fulfil my ‘mum’ role. I am proud that I now have my own fostering registration with my current role at Young People at Heart.
I hope I have shown my daughters that hard work, support, and a can-do attitude are the key ingredients to achieving your goals. As I watch my eldest daughter finishing her first year at college with a clear focus on her future, I admire the resilience and determination she shows and feel secretly proud that I have instilled some of that in her.
Today, on International Women’s Day, I continue to be inspired by the strong women in my team who are all committed and dedicated to supporting their fostering families whilst all juggling their personal responsibilities, and I also draw inspiration from the female foster carers, many of whom are single, constantly battling against difficult systems, to achieve the very best for the young people in their care. You are all amazing!!